Mom Dating

Wow. I've been socializing like... I don't know. I have no good simile for that one. A person who is determined to make "friends" so that her daughter has someone else to play with besides Elmo DVDs?

We went back to the library on Tuesday. This story time was much better than the last one, although she still managed to be semi-disruptive. I should have apologized more to all the fingers she stepped on as the story started, and to the four people she fell on trying to get to the front, and to the kid I sat in front of when I had to go play damage control when Bug-zilla stormed the puppets, etc etc.

She was captivated by the guitar player, and loudly yelled, "MORE MUCK-A" (more music) when the song stopped. This was when she took a break from standing six inches from the librarian reading the story. It was really a delightful story time, albeit a little packed.

No, I'm not joking. She held the woman's leg for most of the story. Note: Child in orange vest, boy or girl? I still have not figured it out. I think his/her feet are the same size as mine.

I met four other "military" women while I was there. I will call them Wispy, Chief, Ta's and Nanny, mainly because I am not creative.

Wispy is from Iowa, and has a daughter who just turned one. I believe they live around the corner from us. Her daughter had the most spherical head I have ever seen. I may be saying this because my own daughter's is half flattened due to her being strapped to her back to sleep without barfing for the first 10 months of her life.

Chief was who I met first. She was extremely outgoing and has a little boy who just turned two. He is smaller than Bug. But that's not saying much when you wear 3T at 20 months. She's pregnant with her second one.

Ta's was sporting, you guessed it, GIGANTIC MIDDLE-AGED BOOBIES, POSSIBLY FULL OF MILK, ON DISPLAY IN A LOW CUT WORKOUT SHIRT. She just had her second boy five months ago. She has not lost her baby weight, but I do not fault her for this whatsoever.

Nanny (see, I've run out of gas) has no children, but babysits for a family in the Village. If I didn't have Bug, this is totally what I'd $$$$$do.

All four of their husbands are on Seal Team Three. They asked me what Matt did first, which meant I only felt asinine two minutes later. Not to belittle what Matt does, but really, Matt has the cushiest job I have ever known, outside maybe Sven Sundgaard. These women were talking about the next deployment, and how they never know how long it will be ("one time he was going to be gone 16 days, and then it turned into eight months, then nine months, then it ended up being eight months") and where they are going. Even though I know other people who have service members in their family, this was the first time for some reason it felt like reality. To really think about if Matt was in that situation. I would either weigh 200 pounds more, or 40 pounds less. Chief's husband leaves again in a month. I didn't ask if he would get to come back for the birth of Baby. Wow. My husband plays the saxophone. Try saying that one out loud after everyone else announces their husbands' co-workers (essentially?) killed Osama Bin Laden. "But he can play a mean 'Anchors Aweigh!'"

Whatever. They were nice. We exchanged phone numbers. If we just meet at story time at the Library every week that would be awesome.

Today I went and met some ladies for coffee that I found through Meetup.com. I kind of love that website. You can find a group for pretty much everything. The leader of this group runs a franchise called Baby Boot Camp which is a workout thing (and which is what made me try this group out... fitness-minded moms that are actually into fitness, and not just a free Weight Watchers program). Bug and I got there early, but didn't have to wait too long. The woman who organized it was very nice, and actually looks like a personal trainer (she is one). I was worried she'd be a bit bimbo, but far from it. From what she described about her classes, they sound fun (lots of plyo, cardio intervals, etc) and a good workout (and more legit than Stroller Strides). The catch is that the babies all stay in their strollers, which Bug would Never Do, Ever. We may try one class for free, and abort after ten minutes if necessary. If anything I'd ask if the woman would just want to go running with me.

The other women were very nice, save for one, which I will get to later. Two looked sort of Jewish. I'm trying to find Jewish women that didn't fall out of a Louis Vuitton store. When I see a possibility, I try and throw out really not-very-well-hidden bait to see if I get a bite. I'm embarrassed to even share this.

Woman 1: "What's your daughter's name"

Me: "It's _____"

"Oh, I love that name. You don't hear it often."

"No, that's why we loved it. Although my Aunt calls her _____ because that's the Yiddish meaning of it."

And I got no response on the Yiddish. Next!

Woman 2 and I are discussing different areas of San Diego and where nice places are to live. She and her family just moved to UTC, which is adjacent to La Jolla. She looked like a possibility.

Me: "I've been looking up there. You know, I'm Jewish and my husband's Catholic, and I know there's a large Jewish community in La Jolla."

Woman 2: "Yeah, there are a lot of churches up there! Like so many different kinds. And there are those guys who have the hair (makes corkscrew gesture by her cheeks)"

Me: "The Orthodox Jews."

Woman 2: "Sure!"

I didn't even bother to correct her that Jews go to Temple, and not Church. (And despite this, she was really very very nice. She allowed Bug to eat the majority of her child's cereal (Ed. note: They were free samples), and didn't even give me any crusty about it).

The third woman was the really weird one. She was a bit abrasive. And her son was... weird. At 3, Bug was exactly his size. The two of them were playing in the corner by some plants when I noticed him pushing her in the chest with two fists. She looked so confused! I had to tell him not to punch, that wasn't nice. I didn't think much of it; I know he had older siblings, and he really wasn't hurting her.

And then I look over and he has grabbed her from behind, and although they are the exact same size he pulls her down onto the ground (!!!). Perhaps due to this size equality, he ends up hurting himself, and she just looks bewildered. I ask her if she's OK, and she says yes. Meanwhile he starts fake crying and Mom is all, "oh honey, what's the matter? Did you hurt yourself?" I want to yell, yeah, while he body slammed my daughter, but I really didn't want to get involved with her whatsoever. THAT'S how creepy she was.

After that, we went to Target (UGH! They are so gross down here.) and then Bug passed out in the car on the way home. I even tried shaking her legs as we drove and she slept right through it. Her geneticist called while we were in the car, so I let her sleep in the driveway while I finished the call (more on that when I've calmed down and done more research; nothing fatal and no magic answers, don't worry, Mom). Then I idiotically thought I would bring her inside when I should have just sat outside on the driveway in the sun and let her sleep. She woke up when I crossed the threshold into the house and refused to nap again the entire afternoon.

I have not yet bitched about the Early Intervention services here because I've been using all my energy being mad at them. Basically, they don't exist. State services do not exist in California. While they do have an "Early Start" program, it is "treatment of last resort," meaning if you have private insurance and that covers therapy then they will do nothing for you. It just makes me sad because the services we got in MN from Edina Public Schools were so amazing, and if it weren't for Joan, I don't think Bug would be walking right now. Sigh. We have an appointment next week to start PT at the Children's Hospital here. I'm really hoping I like it there.

It was something like 80 degrees today. The weather is so beautiful here it seems like it should be against the law to be inside during the day. You should all come visit, now.