Somehow I got this crazy deal because I told the guy like seventy times that we were a military family and that I only needed something through the first week of December. Soo.... I paid only $60 and I'm good until we leave. Crazy, right?
Today was my first day there. Of course I decided to take the total conditioning class that they had all raved about. I dropped off Bug to the ridiculously strict child care center (Rule 37: If we have to wipe your child's nose more than three times, you will be paged. Rule 43: If your child cannot be consoled after 10 minutes, you will be paged.) and went down to the studio.
At first I thought there was another class still finishing up because there were step bench-things all over everywhere. So I hung around outside until I realized, uhh, no, that was the class I was supposed to be in. It took me a while to figure out which of the ladies in there was the instructor (only because she stepped up onto the front platform) so I asked her what I needed. I got all of my equipment and sat on the floor (what the hell else are you supposed to do beforehand? It's not like yoga where I can accidentally fall asleep on my yoga mat before class.) I have no contacts left so I'm partially blind when I work out, which is probably better because then I can't see in detail how cut some of these women are.
I was so jazzed! I couldn't wait to have this class kick my butt in seven places. But then I started getting a few doubts when I saw the WIDE RANGE of outward fitness levels filling in as we got closer to start time. Including the women directly in front of me. Hmm.
Class started and I was IMMEDIATELY reminded why I was never a dancer. It shouldn't be hard. Step touch four times, then step kick, then step touch... or was it step kick, step touch, reach? DAMMIT.
Not my gig, really, but that's OK. There was a ton of lunge work that really worked my glutes and hamstrings. I think my favorite part was actually when one of the child care girls came down to class:
All of sudden the instructor says, "Uh oh, here comes Liz! Everyone hide!" I am trying so hard to be step-touching the same direction as the rest of the class that I have no idea who she is talking about. Is this a regular who is late that we are making fun of?
Turns out Liz is from child care, and she has walked into the studio holding a mini white board over her head like a bikini girl at a boxing match announcing the rounds. There is a woman's name written on it, who quickly leaves class. So that's how they tell you your child has been misbehaving! Brilliant!
A song comes on that samples "I Want Candy." All of a sudden the instructor is berating us about eating candy. "I know it's Halloween, ladies, but you just have to SAY NO. Why waste all of your hard work on that? You know what, if you want to eat candy, don't even bother wasting your time coming to class."
I find this incredibly, incredibly amusing. I want to yell out, "COMING TO CLASS IS THE ONLY WAY I CAN JUSTIFY EATING THE CANDY (CORN)!" but I don't. (And I really did see her face in my mind as I stuffed handfuls of it in my face this afternoon.)
After class is over I'm barely sweating. I know I could have worked harder in some places, and because the room isn't heated like it is at CorePower I'm not sweating as much. I'm really hoping I'm in some serious pain tomorrow morning.
I go upstairs to get Bug and she doesn't want to leave. Good sign! I ask the girl how she did and she is sort of snotty when she says, "she was good except she wanted to be held the last ten minutes." So? Is this a problem? She's 18 months old and this is the first time she's ever been here. I was gone almost two hours, and you're snippy at me because she wanted you to hold her for the last ten minutes? Bitch, please. So I said thank you and reserved a spot for her again tomorrow morning.
I guess my whole point is that child care + workout = BRILLIANT. I know it's not a new concept, but still, I can appreciate it. Is it bad parenting if she's there five days a week?
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